Prolonged sexlessness seems to have become a common phenomenon, with more and more couples, not having a conjugal life.
Sex is the cornerstone of marriage, long-term sexlessness will inevitably bring new tests to both spouses, the probability of relationship problems also greatly increased. Feelings fade, create a gap, extramarital affairs…
So, how does long-term sexlessness affect men and women, and what are the specific differences?
Men: more likely to cheat
Writer Feng Tang said, “Love equals love plus sex, and without sex, there is no love.”
The same is true for marriage. Sex plays an important role in the relationship between husband and wife, and if there is no sex for a long time, it will greatly increase the possibility of the husband cheating. There are two main reasons for this:
First, long-term sexlessness has a greater impact on male physiology.
Long-term sexlessness will affect the male state, the Internet said “use in the waste” is true. Long-term sexlessness may be premature ejaculation, affecting the quality of sperm.
Secondly, even though men have been sexless for a long time, their biological needs are still there.
Although it is said that when women reach middle age, their physiological needs will also increase, but on the whole, men’s physiological needs are still higher than women.
The British Medical Journal once published a survey, the report shows: the United States men’s sex life active age on average lasts until 65 years old, women for 60 years old. 75 years old men, 38.9% of the people are still sexually active, while the same age group of women for 16.8%.
If men can’t get satisfaction from their wives for a long time, they will try to get it from somewhere else, and the likelihood of cheating will increase greatly.
Of course, this is not to say that a man’s long-term sexlessness will necessarily lead to cheating, only to say that long-term sexlessness is an important factor in men’s cheating, but not the only factor.
From the perspective of psychology and big data, there are three main reasons for men to cheat:
One is that cheating fulfills a need or desire that he has not met in an intimate relationship, and this need may be a physical need or an emotional need;
Two, cheating is his way of avoiding conflicts and problems. There are many men who cheat, not that he is in love with the other person and does not want to get a divorce, but just want to escape the pressure of family and work in this way.
This is also the reason why the probability of cheating between coworkers is high, not only spend time together, but also work resonance.
Thirdly, cheating just to get back at his wife. This is commonly found in marriages where the woman is strong and the man is weak, and the husband is in a state of being suppressed for a long time, but he is unable to change, so he chooses to cheat to take revenge on the other side, and to find self-confidence in other women.
Women: not much impact
In contrast, prolonged sexlessness doesn’t seem to affect women very much. There are 3 main reasons for this:
First, long-term sexlessness does not have any effect on women’s physiology.
Although there are a lot of rumors on the Internet, such as “long-term sexlessness will lead to endocrine disruption, premature ovarian failure”, seems to be a strong statement, but in fact they are false.
At present, there is no medical evidence that no sex will lead to endocrine disruption and premature ovarian failure. If according to this statement, those girls who have menstruation after puberty will not be worse off?
On the contrary, the benefits of not having sex are obvious, such as the probability of contracting gynecological diseases is greatly reduced.
Secondly, women’s need for sex is not as strong as men’s.
Writer Junichi Watanabe said, “Temptation itself is based on human needs. Men dabble in womanizing mainly to seek the satisfaction of body and soul, while women red herrings are mainly to make up for the lack of emotional spirit.”
Indeed, for women, “Sexual impotence is a small matter, love impotence is a big matter.” Women value emotional value more than physical needs.
So if a woman has a husband who respects and loves his wife and has a strong sense of responsibility for the family, she will not be tempted by the outside world to commit acts of betrayal even if she is sexless for a long time.
Plus, the patriarchal society has suppressed women for thousands of years, resulting in women having a higher sense of morality and higher demands on themselves, and a lower probability of cheating.
Thirdly, women’s previous sexual life is not necessarily harmonious.
We might as well look at a set of foreign scientific data first:
Academics generally use the ejaculation latency period (referred to as IELT) to measure the length of sexual intercourse. According to research studies, the average value of male ejaculation latency is 8.49 minutes, while Chinese men’s IELT is between 3 and 10 minutes.
Hmmm…that means…a lot of men aren’t as good as they say they are.
It’s also true that too many women are unable to feel pleasure during sex.
According to clinical medical data, the average percentage of women reaching orgasm is 40-60%, and as many as 1/2 or even 2/3 of all women have had the experience of faking an orgasm.
What’s more, it’s already the 21st century, and many women have learned to please their bodies in a healthy way. Data show that in the past ten years, China’s adult paraphernalia market has skyrocketed, and 60% of the purchasing population are married women who have children.
Therefore, for many women, long-term sexlessness is not an unacceptable big deal.